I guess a bit of history would be important at this point - but where to start is always problematic. Last September found myself the same place I was exactly three years ago - well not exactly. A recurrence isn't "exactly", it's a bit worse. I had just gotten comfortable with the doctor's follow up visits and not completely freaking out whenever anything hurt. For example - I would cough, uh oh, I don't have a cold... oh dear, it could be a tumor in my lungs... oh hell, I am dying. Or it would be time for my 3 month follow up or scan and even though I logically know that nothing is drastically different 24 hours verse 48 hours before a scan, the panic ladder would begin. Now, not that I don't have a genetic predisposition for hypochondria as my Mom relishes in her self-proclaimed neurosis; but I had thought I escaped it. And then there was cancer -so that changed too.
Anyway, back in September just before one of those follow up visits, I found a lump in my abdomen and my nightmare started all over again.
